I am staying strong

Since my last hospital stay, I must admit that things are easier, but the pain and the cognitive issues still remain. It's a new year and I am trying to stay positive, kind and humble. I want those around me to feel loved and be happy. I spent such a wonderful evening at my cousin's house that I felt things might start looking up for me and my family. I hope that people will accept who I am. I am a practicing pagan, but I do not consider myself pagan. I'm simply spiritual. But practicing the rituals and spells of paganism keeps me focused and thoughtful. I no longer want to take things for granted and following their rituals helps me be aware of the important people and objects around me.

I've been on disability since 2020, and I feel like my life only got worse. There is this feeling you get when you can no longer do things; it’s called: useless. And I have been feeling this way since I left work in December 2019. I’m told I’m not useless. Yet, I don’t feel any better. However, this past month since my return home I have found myself looking for new things to do. Although I haven't started anything yet, I have started cleaning and arranging things in order for me to do some of the things I used to do and love, like crafting and drawing. It’s quite difficult to find the motivation to get things done but I am getting there. It’s a long road ahead but I know that I must be strong
and stay strong.